Winning???

First, thanks for all of the feedback from the last blog, Youth Sports...let's be honest!  I am so happy to know that it has people thinking!  It honestly was not meant to be a negative post and I'm thankful that everyone saw it as positive...as a way to start to discussion on how our community can change the culture of our youth sports programs...which I believe can change the culture in our schools and the culture in our community as a whole!  We, as adults, teach our children how to treat others.  We may be preaching to the children that we should accept differences, treat other with respect, encourage everyone to be involved, etc. but what we actually do and how we actually treat others is what they see and how they learn to behave!
Reminds me of the saying, "Actions speak louder than words!"  And makes me think of our Little League. We can say that we have a "draft" in Little League to make the teams "fair"...but it always ends up that certain teams are "stacked"?  I do not for one second believe it "just happens"...it is planned...and little "rules" are adjusted each year so that certain coaches can get certain kids and certain men can coach together. It has never been about teaching all of the boys the fundamentals of baseball or working together to make it a positive experience for all involved.  It has never been about trying to divide up the pitchers and players so that each team has one or two kids that can pitch and at least throw the ball over the plate...so that there is actually game play during the games!  It has been about getting certain "special" kids together on one team so that they can "win"!  Just typing that sounds crazy, and hard to believe...but it happens!
I guess, I can't say never!  Last year in the minor league, I know that the coaches actually made an effort to split up the pitchers and helped to separate the teams evenly!  We actually didn't know who was going to win the games before they even started!  It was really fun to watch!  And the kids cheered each other on!  It was a great experience!

So, what about WINNING???

Is winning a bad thing? Is wanting to win a bad thing?

My answer to that is NO!!!  Winning, or the desire to win, is NOT a bad thing! 

What is bad about Winning?...as related to youth sports (13/14 & under)...

• being desperate to win
• winning at all costs mentality
• when winning or losing determines self-worth
• when winning is valued MORE than effort, sportsmanship, teamwork, or doing what is right
• when winning is the ONLY focus and determines if a game was a success...a team could play their best game ever and still lose...so is the entire game considered a failure?
• when youth are not given opportunities because of fear the team might lose if they play
• when kids are told they are "bad" or made to feel like failures for not winning a game

An anonymous reader commented and asked this...

 In early January of this year, President Obama welcomed the Dallas Mavericks to the white house to recognize them as the NBA champions. He was given a team jersey and told them how proud he was of the team and their success. I did not observe the second place team at that meeting. If winning is celebrated by the president and at the highest office in our country, how hard it it going to be to change the example in your own home town.
Looking forward to your response!

Here is my response...

I have no problem with celebrating winning...winning normally comes from a good work ethic, teamwork, practice, commitment, drive, talent, & perseverance. The exact things that I think youth sports should be teaching our children. I think great teams and examples of effort and teamwork should be celebrated...not worshiped, but acknowledged.
If, in our community we do not build up all children and give all of them equal opportunities, regardless of name & social status, we are not only hurting them, we are hurting the future of our school sports programs! How much better is a basketball team when they have 10 or 12 great players, instead of only 3 or 5? If you don't have strong practices and players pushing your starters to work to keep their spots, your team suffers. A perfect example of that is our state championship basketball team...they had a "deep bench"...they had key players coming in off the bench...they had developed the majority of the team, not just the few chosen ones!
If we want successful, winning sports programs in our community, we MUST get past the selfishness and the desire of our children to be "the best"! Our children will celebrate success and winning when they learn to be unselfish, want the best for their teammates, develop a strong work ethic, learn to encourage others, learn to be a good teammate and have fun playing! In my opinion, winning is not a negative thing...the desire and desperation to win at any cost and hurting people to ensure your child is the best is negative!


For those readers who may not know me, I have been told by a reader that I need to tell a little about myself and my sports background...as to let people know I am not just a disgruntled parent that wants my kids to be something I wasn't or a mom that has children who are not athletic at all, that have been mistreated and not allowed to play.  Neither of those is the case.  I played volleyball and was a setter on a Shelbyville High School team that got 2nd in State.  I played on a successful club team throughout high school. I also played 4 years at Millikin University as the starting setter...I won many awards and was even named a Division III All-American my senior year.  I coached one year at SHS and took the team to State (even after being told we would not win half of our games!) and was named Herald & Review Coach of the Year. I coached at Lake Land College one year before I got pregnant with Bart!  And I have also coached a club team and helped with various teams over the years. But none of the awards matter to me and I rarely tell anyone that information...what matters to me are the fun times I had with my teammates and the relationships I formed both with players and coaches!  What matters to me are the letters I have gotten from old coaches, old teammates or players I coached. When I get letters from players I coached telling me that they learned so much from...more than just volleyball, I always cry!  That is what it is all about!

Also, my three children are fairly athletic, they enjoy sports (sometimes) and if they want to play that is great with me but I don't care what sports they choose...I just want them to be active, work hard, enjoy it and have fun!  Yes, they have had some negative experiences along the way in our youth programs but those are not the reasons for my concern.  My concern is more general and for those kids that can not speak up for themselves or who have parents who won't or can't for fear of how they will be treated, for fear of their jobs (yes, their jobs!) and out of fear that their children will be treated even worse.  And trust me, I have spoke up before about these issues...I understand their concern all to well!  People who encourage elitism in sports DO NOT like to be called out and don't like others to point out what is really going on!

So, back to winning...I am all for it!  Like I said yesterday, I am very competitive...I love a close, competitive game...but there is a time and place for it...and youth sports is not that place!!! Once children get into school sports, especially high school, I am OK with playing to win...not at any cost, but working together to win through good work ethic, hustle, practice, teamwork, setting goals, etc!

I believe the teams I played on and coached were successful for the following reasons:

• GOOD WORK ETHIC...practicing hard..giving 100% at all times
• believing we would win every time we walked in the gym...confident, not arrogant
• wanting success for and encouraging our teammates
• Playing TOGETHER as a TEAM!
• NO concern for who got the credit...no concern about stats! ( I hate stats!)
• WE HAD FUN!!!
• We discussed character and being good people and good teammates, not just good players
• Coaches who demanded RESPECT and hard work!
• Parents who wanted success for ALL players
• Parents who supported the coaches
• Parents who didn't blame others for losses or take all credit for wins
• Parents that encouraged and supported the TEAM and didn't see their child as deserving special treatment
• Coaches who cared and wanted us all to do well
• NEVER had a coach who was a parent of a child on the team!!!  BINGO!!
• Players that LOVED the game and WANTED to be there...were not forced by parents!
• We were not players...WE WERE PLAYERS!!! (insert fist pumps!)  We played HARD!
• Had no sense of entitlement just because we were good!
• Set goals and did NOT give up on them!
• Had the support of the school and community!!!  Critical point!
• Players who worked to improve themselves...we wanted it!  Not our parents...we did!

So, there ya go...more to think about!  I am still reading and finding out more and more interesting information!  I think tomorrow's blog will be interesting!  I will have some links to some articles that will make you think!

I feel like I rambled today...what's new, right?
 I LOVE the feedback...even if you DON'T agree!  Keep it coming!  Discussion and sharing views is what starts change!!!  Posting without a final read through...yikes...ignore the mistakes!

Youth Sports...let's be honest

Well, here it is...the blog where I start stating my opinion...and most likely ticking people off. My intention isn't to make someone mad...or to single any one person out. My intention it to get EVERYONE to THINK...to use your BRAIN and CONSIDER what we are supporting and encouraging in our youth. My intention is to make you FEEL...to use your HEART and CONSIDER other peoples feelings. Then use both your mind and your heart to take a long look at what we have been "teaching" the children in our community and what society has been teaching to youth all over this country. Before I get started, I want to state that I realize there are far more important things in life to worry about like education, health, poverty, cancer...the list goes on. But lately, youth sports (and when I say "youth", I am referring to age 13 and under) has been on my mind and I have being doing a lot of thinking, a lot of discussing, and a lot of research about the effects of youth sports on children, looking at the positives and negatives and looking at what could be done differently to make it better for everyone involved. Much of what I am going to share with you, is NOT just my opinion, but the opinion of educators, researchers, & sport psychologists. I am NOT perfect and definitely NOT a perfect parent! I have made many mistakes in my life...many mistakes as a coach...and many more mistakes as a parent. I can't change that and I can't deny it...but I can work to do better in the future! I can educate myself, I can learn from my mistakes and the mistakes of others, and I can pray and ask God to help me see where I am doing wrong or witnessing wrong-doing and to stand up and do what is right!
I want to say that I LOVE sports! I love to play almost anything! I love to watch almost any sport! I appreciate athletic ability and I really value amazing work ethic and teamwork! I love that when I played volleyball, I made some lasting friendships, not only with teammates but with my coaches. I have some wonderful memories that I will always hold dear to my heart! I learned so much from my coaches, not just about volleyball, but about working to reach my goals, being a team player, and about being a better person off of the court. I had teammates who wanted the best for each other and who realized that in order to be a great team, we all had to do our best, accept our role, work together and that when we did those things, it would be FUN and we would BE SUCCESSFUL!! Overall, being involved in sports was a very positive experience for me! I think that is why I really struggle with our youth sports programs today! The positive aspects of sports seem to be slipping away...quickly!

Just like the show "Toddlers & Tiara's", I could see a show titled "Boys & Balls"...the parents on "Toddlers & Tiaras" are exactly like the many desperate parents involved in youth sports today! That may sound funny...but if you stop and think, it is TRUE, sad but true!! It is the same thing!!

Since my oldest son, Bart, who is now almost 14, started playing soccer and t-ball 10 years ago, I have been confused, concerned, down right aggravated and overall completely disappointed in how the youth programs are handled in our community. Flag football is the ONLY program where each child was treated as equal and important. Every child was taught the same things, worked with all of the coaches, and were given chances to play different positions. When teams were divided up to play games, they were divided up as fairly as possible and the teams didn't stay the same. Certain children were not made out to be "the stars" or viewed as more important than the others! It seemed to be a great experience for all involved...learned some basics, played the game and had FUN!

My concern with most youth sports programs is that we are teaching the following to the kids:

-to win at all costs...even if that means cheating, lying, excluding, stacking teams, hurting others.

-you are only valuable if you are the best

-if you lack athletic ability, then you lack worth.

-if your team wins, then you are better than others and deserve special treatment

-if your dad is in charge of the league then you are guaranteed to get the best team and play the best positions, with all your friends. (found a article about exactly that...sounds very familiar!!!)
-that when you get the best players on your team you really don't have to work hard...you just show up and automatically win because that is how it the league has been set up. So, a strong work ethic is never developed but a since of entitlement is!

-that we are discouraging kids from continuing to play because they lose every game, feel like failures, and see that only "the stars" or certain kids are really important...due to how adults set up the teams and handle the leagues. Which in turn leads to low numbers in school sports because kids have already quit and decided they do not like sports BEFORE they get to 7th grade!

-that everyone is your competition and that you shouldn't want them to succeed, otherwise, you might not be the best. Which leads to LACK of TEAMWORK once they get to school sports because they see their teammates as competition...as someone standing in their way of being the best. I actually believe I have witnessed kids play who would rather lose a game, than see their teammates be successful. How sad is that??

-because that being the best is ALL that matters. NOT your effort, your hustle, your attitude, your improvement...

- that playing sports is NOT about having fun, NOT about working together as a team, NOT about encouraging one another, NOT about improving and mastering skills, NOT about enjoying good competition...it is only about WINNING at ANY COST, making yourself look good and degrading anyone that might be better than you or not as talented as you!!

-that if you lose you are a failure...and that your less valuable. I see many parents that seem to feel their own self-worth is determined by their child's athletic performance. Talk about pressure on a child! Makes me feel badly for them! ( I've been guilty of this, when Bart was young, but I learned quickly! Thankfully!)

Is that really what we want to teach our children? Not me!!! So, I feel like I spend extra time at home trying to reteach them and discuss what is really important and how to be a good teammate and have good sportsmanship! I will admit that I am very competitive. I believe that if you are going to play...you PLAY and you HUSTLE! You always give 100% and never settle for less than YOUR best! But I would rather play a great competitive game, against a great team and lose, than play a bad team and win easily...what fun is that? Playing on equal teams, when you don't know before hand who is going to win, is much more fun, exciting, and much of a learning experience for all! And making it a fun, exciting, learning, growing experience is what it is all about! That's why we love playoffs and big games...watching great competition is fun!

I was listening to a podcast through the Positive Coaching Alliance and the discussion was questioning if youth sports really build character...that is a very debatable question. I believe that sports mainly reveal character...and may shape character in a positive or negative way. It all depends on the coach and the culture of the programs. If children play in programs that encourage the values listed above, positive character is not going to be developed. Children coming out of these programs will likely have bad attitudes, a since of entitlement, lack of respect, lack of teamwork and a poor work ethic. Exactly opposite of what most people hope are the character building benefits of being involved in sports.


"It is amazing how much you can accomplish when it doesn't matter who gets the credit."

This brings me to another issue that I have been reading about...Elitism in youth sports. What is that exactly? Well, let me just share with you some points from a man named Scott Lancaster....
Here is a link directly to the article...


He states that elitism in youth sports/travel teams cause the following...

- not providing proper Athletic/Skill development

- unfairly and prematurely judging their ability and potential

- taking away valuable time on town fields & facilities for a handful of chosen ones

– ultimately destroying your town’s future success at the high school level.

Lancaster says that PARENTS are the main cause of the problem...

We have allowed a universe of parents to ruin sports for kids. A universe that most likely experienced little or no athletic success themselves. A selfish universe that doesn’t care about other kids in their community, and feel their children are entitled to play on elite teams over others. This group of ignorant souls are relieved when their child’s competition is whittled away and told there not good enough to make a team before they’ve reached puberty. Everyone, this is the harsh reality of today’s youth sports experience.

Unfortunately the trend is getting worse rather than better. When parents do ask why there is only “one travel team per town per age group” and why there cannot be “multiple travel teams of the same age from the same town equally divided talent wise” they’re denied. Their reason, “we need to be competitive when we play other towns”. In other words, it’s more important to win a 9 year old travel team game than it is to unselfishly develop many more athletes with a passion to play.

If you’re a high school coach with any sense of athletic and program development experience you would put a stop to segregating kids before the age of 14, and allow all kids the opportunity to develop equally. Let’s face the true reality, the kids you see on Select /Travel Teams now will most likely not be starring or playing in high school. Ultimately Travel/Select Teams build false hope among entitled parents at the expense of destroying many other kids hopes to play with their friends and develop athletically.

If you’re a town administrator or athletic director, it should be your responsibility to put a stop to elitism in sports. The results would be the opportunity to keep more kids involved and active therefore cutting down on the many bad things that happen when active options are taken away from kids.

If you’re a parent of a child on a travel/select team you’ll selfishly glance right past this issue, but if your a parent that has young children not yet involved in organized sports, this is your opportunity to fix it now, and demand change. If THAT ARTICLE DOESN'T MAKE YOU STOP AND THINK...NOTHING WILL!!!!

As mature, educated adults, especially those of us who call ourselves Christians, we should to want to provide positive experiences for EACH child who wants to play youth sports!

to be continued....I will be writing about and sharing more information on the topic of youth sports all week...and anytime I find interesting information! Hopefully, finding alternatives, answers and suggestions for improving the win at all costs, elitism culture of youth sports!

And last but not least, I do have the best of intentions and I want what is best for all kids, so if you don't like what I have to say or the information I share, you don't have to read my blog and you don't have to click on the links! If any of the comments or information offend you, maybe you should ask yourself why? None of this should upset you, if you have truly had no part in cultivating the culture of elitism in youth sports!

Coach Dean Smith to Michael Jordan in his freshman year at UNC"
Michael, if you can't pass, you can't play."

Funny Stuff

I'm really needing to laugh today...

Poor Theresa, once Matt sees this, they'll have one at each door!

This is Nasty!

Maybe this would get Brett and other boys to brush their teeth without the use of force!

LOIS LOGIC???

More Lois Logic??

Worse than an ugly Christmas Sweater...Matt probably shouldn't see this either!

Something my brother would do! 

This cracked me up!

Rocky Mountain Oyster...raw!

Just what you've always wanted to see!

(sorry, can't get the picture right!)

Have a great day!!!

Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, Nobody

I love Joyce Meyer! I believe that when I was struggling with things in life, God used her to to give me answers and direction. Listening to her podcasts, reading her books and watching her TV show has changed my life!  Her words have encouraged me to be a better person and to grow my relationship with God!  She is funny, she says it like it is, she challenges me to look at myself and to be accountable for my thoughts and actions...she does NOT allow me to blame others for your problems or sadness...she is just what I needed!
I read her devotional "Love Out Loud" on a daily basis.  This morning, the message really caught my attention and I decided I should share it on my blog!   Hopefully, it will make you think...and act!

I will just share exactly as it is in the book....
 
Years ago I heard a story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody and Nobody.  There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it.  Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it.  Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job.  Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it.  In the end, Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done. 
I once read a book about a shocking incident that shows the principals of this story at work-tragically-in real life.  in 1964 Catherine Genovese was stabbed to death over a period of 35 minutes while 88 neighbors watched.  Their reaction was described as cold and uncaring, a result of urban apathy and alienation.  Later, research by Latane and Darley revealed that no one had helped simply because there were so many observers.  The observers looked to one another for guidance on what to do.  Since no one was doing anything, they determined that no one should do anything.
We are affected by the actions of people around us.  We look to one another for direction, often without even knowing it. Most people will agree with the majority even when they really don't agree!
If, as Christians, we want to demonstrate love to the world around us, we must become examples to others instead of merely following the crowd!
When you have the ability to help someone, don't assume somebody else will do it.  Do it yourself!

Really made me think! 

I know I see many things, on a daily basis, that I disagree with and that I know are not right and may even be hurting someone...but because the "majority" or "the people who run things" are ok with it or even encourage it, I don't step up and do anything to stop it or change it!  I really struggle with this more than you'll ever realize.  I REALLY struggle when I see children getting hurt in any way...because I know that one, just one, unkind statement from an adult or other child or a negative experience that could be prevented,  can leave a child scarred for life!  Can we stop every bad thing from happening?  No!  I realize that!  But if we see "organized"  unkindness, unfairness, suffering or mistreatment and we choose to look the other way...we are not only letting others be hurt...we are sharers in the guilt...we are sinning!

If we all could get the courage to be bold and stand up for those who can't stand up for themselves, think what a different world this would be!   Yes, I know it is difficult!  And yes, you will make some enemies.  But if someone wants to be your enemy for standing up for others, do you really want them on your side in the first place?

Just to make you think...#2

Short on time...so here you go...more quotes to make you think!

As you know, I am not afraid to say what I think or to stand up for what I believe!  I often feel like I am standing all alone.  It's not easy...but I have to be able to live with myself!  I'll never understand how people can see an injustice or someone being hurt and just ignore it...I'm just not wired that way!  Sometimes, I wish I could turn off my "care button"... "my heart often responds to more than my life allows me to act upon!"

These are a few other quotes that I love that go along...

"MY DOCTRINE IS THIS,

THAT IF WE SEE CRUELTY OR WRONG

THAT WE HAVE THE POWER TO STOP,

AND DO NOTHING,

WE MAKE OURSELVES SHARERS IN THE GUILT."

"The one thing that doesn't abide

by majority rule

 is a person's conscience."

So,

I know there are people who do not like me because I voice my opinion on issues.  I really struggle with people who crave power and want to control everything for their own benefit.  I despise it when people think they are better than others, because they have a "good job", money, "the right name", hang around the "cool" crowd or hold a certain position.  I would rather have a few friends and a few people like me while being true to myself and my beliefs, than to have everyone like me and compromise my values and morals to "fit in" to a certain crowd!  So, when I saw this quote, it made me smile!  It's awesome!

Do you stand up for what you believe in? 

Do you compromise your values and morals to "fit in"? 

Isn't this great?  And so true!!

WHEN THE POWER OF LOVE

OVERCOMES

THE LOVE OF POWER

THE WORLD

WILL KNOW PEACE!

Just think how much different things would be in our homes, schools, churches,  organizations, community, local government, state government, federal government, if the power of love could overcome the love of power!  What a different world it would be!

If we all could just....

Things could be so much better!  Is it really that difficult to smile at someone, to say hello, to treat everyone with respect?  Is it really that difficult to encourage our children to be more understanding, accepting, kind and generous?  Is it too much to ask to treat each and every person we meet as an equal...a brother or sister in Christ?  Wouldn't it be great if we could appreciate differences and uniqueness in others? 

We all are entitled to our opinions, thoughts, and ideas.  I love to argue my side of things, but I also can agree to disagree!  I love Darren so much, but we have differing views on many things....but that doesn't mean I love him any less!  I have very close friends that I discuss issues with and we often disagree...but I still love and respect them.  Sometimes it is not easy, but we can still love and respect others even if they are different or don't agree with our opinions!!! 

 The world would be so boring if we were all the same!

Speaking of boring, I don't want to get to serious...or i know you'll stop reading...so let's have a little fun!

That cracked me up!!!  Doesn't that look like Darren???

No comment!

And maybe I'm not "The Norm" either...and that's OK with me!

Oh how I LOVE Chris Farley!  Sure wish he was still here with us!

He was one funny man!

And this guy...he makes me laugh, too!  I adore him! 

 Do you know who this is??

One last thought....

I struggle with this sometimes and other times I think I do ok.  But I think we all need to tell others how we feel about them, even if it might be uncomfortable!  I try to let the important people in my life know that I love and care about them and that I am thankful  and blessed to have them in my life! 

So, go out and hug someone that matters to you and tell them how much you love and appreciate them...

AND DO IT TODAY!

Granny...29 Again!

Granny Lois & Grandpa Bob

If you know me very well at all, you know my Granny Lois is one of my very favorite gals on the earth!  She has been like a best friend to me for as long as I can remember!  And as scary as it might be, I got a lot from her...my short legs, my stubby fingers, torn off nails, turtle toes...a diet coke addiction, as well as a love of shoes, make-up, books, clothing and magazines!  I also rub my feet together when I an sitting still, just like she does.  Darren and my friends say I act just like her...I just don't get that!  I do admit that I use her favorite logic of all time...and that is responding to most questions or statements with the word "well".  Only we drag it out a little...so I guess I should say, "WEELLL!"

Me, Darren & Granny...look how tiny she is!  Fall 1991

Today is Granny's birthday.  I won't share her age, otherwise she might disown me...heck, she will probably disown me anyway.  You see, I didn't get her a very nice gift today.  All she got from me was blueberry cheesecake soft serve from Druby's....and she drove to my house to pick it up.  I am a pretty rotten granddaughter, if I do say so myself!  I'll make it up to her...someday!  Oh wait...I did do something for her...I stayed up all night last fall in the ER in Effingham, after teaching Body Pump...still in my workout clothes, while she drooled over her handsome male nurses!  I was so tired, I was delirious!  Aunt Carol and I giggled all night long!  Poor Granny!  So, I say we are even!  Don't ya think?  Really,  I'd do it again tonight if she needed me...and she knows that!

Happy Halloween...with some of her great- grandkids

Darren and I tease Granny often, very often...and giggle at some (most) of the things she says...
So, late this afternoon, she asks me about writing this blog...wonders just where I come up with these big ideas!  Well, (see there it is again) I don't think it's that big of a deal, I tell her that I just write what is on my mind!  And she says it would be hard for her...must not be anything in her mind! (She said that...not me!)

Granny...celebrating Brett's birthday with a pie in the face!

So, for her birthday, she gets to write a blog...share her advice with the WORLD!  (Ok, so maybe it really is  just a few people in Shelbyville...but don't tell her that...I think she thinks I'm famous!)

Huh???  Well!!!

So here ya go...here is some what we love to call

"Lois Logic"...

advice, tips & other useless information from Lois...

on cooking... "Since I never did like to cook, even with 5 kids, and I still don't like to cook, I'd say do the easiest, fastest thing you can think of..."

Granny, Jennifer, Abbie & Diane...I got them all aprons, so they can cook!

on housekeeping..."Don't let it get ahead of ya, you'll be in trouble!"

on ironing..."Now, I used to like to iron but I don't even do it anymore! I always had to have a crease down the front of my pants!"

on laundry..."Well, I'm very particular about my laundry...I only wash whites with white things, red with red things, blue jeans with blue jeans, and khakis with khaki things...I don't know!"  

on stain removal..."I pretreat all stains with oxyclean or something to that affect AND since my washer does not adjust like it should, I have to adjust it manually.  I do not wash in cold!  So, sometimes I have to do some manual adjustments to get it just right!"  (INTERESTING?)

on skin care..."Inherit good skin from your mother!  My mother NEVER wore a touch of make-up on her face! And I have heard people say that she never had a wrinkle...but I don't think that is true!"

on dieting...(this could take a while!)..."Don't yo-yo diet.  It will make you have wrinkles.  That's why I have so many wrinkles!"  So, I asked her if you should starve yourself?  She replied, "Yes, that's what I did!"

on drinking..."I don't drink!  I don't know when I've ever had a drink! (REALLY??? I wish you could see the puzzled look on my face...mouth open wide!) "IT'S TRUE!"  So, I ask her about going to The Legion.  She says, "I don't go there anymore, but I used to drink when I went there. I had water & Vodka!" (But she can't recall ever having a drink???)  and she continues, "I did have some wine the other day, oh at the restaurant where they give you a free glass, oh that Olive Garden!"  OK...now the truth comes out!

on cures for common ailments..."I don't know about that, but I do know that Vodka will help you keep from coughing for a while!"  We laugh and laugh!  THEN she says, "I used to take a little pill bottle full of vodka to work at the Sale Barn to help me keep from coughing!"  (this from the lady who can't recall drinking!)  "But they knew about me bringing it to work!"  Nice, Granny, real Nice!



First time in a pool "swimming" in FL...I took her and Abbie to stay with Aunt Maggie!  Now, that was a trip!
I was so proud of her!  She is terrified of water!


on traveling..."You can travel all you want but just go home and sleep in your own bed!!  I like to sleep in my own bed!"  Where is you favorite place to visit?  "I don't know...(LONG PAUSE) Florida!  Or California is prettier than FL and I always like to go to Tennessee!"

on cars..."I like fancy cars and red ones! They don't have to be super fast!"

on clothing/style..."I like anything that makes me look younger...and taller...and thinner, yeah!"
what is your favorite piece of clothing now..."Bootleg jeans. I feel better in them than anything!"

on getting a good nights sleep..."I don't know, cause sometimes I do and sometimes I don't!"
So, do you recommend wearing underwear to bed? "Well, yes, sometimes!"  Well, when I was a kid, you told me I shouldn't wear them to bed! Right?  So do you wear underwear to bed?
"Don't ask such personal questions!"

on marriage..."Separate bedrooms and earplugs!"

I LOVE this...so typical...although Bob's eyes are open...not so typical!

on being a Granny..."Well, that's why they say 'Life begins at 40', I guess!" 

What else do you want to tell me..."Well, you probably have enough!"

What your biggest pet peeve..."Oh Gosh...Grandpa saying nothing is his fault!  And there is only two of us in the house...and I didn't do it...and he says he didn't!"  (insert: eye roll!)


"I need to go home and get supper!  Even if it is my birthday, I am gonna get in trouble if I don't get home and fix somethin'!"

What's your favorite thing about me, Granny???  (Laughing) "I don't know!  All the good things people say about you...that's what I like!"   Isn't that nice...she can't think of one single thing!

Just look at those eyebrows!

What do you want to do before your next birthday?  "In the next year??? Go on a trip!"

Anything else you want to share...."Oh, I don't know!  You can't have too many books, just like you can't have too much money!"

Are you a hoarder? "Yes, I think, partly!  I hoard shoes, clothes, magazines and books!"  ( I KNOW where I get it!!)

"You had better let me read it before you put it in there!"...(In where???) 

To which I reply, "NOPE!"  (insert: huff/puff and eye roll by Lois)

Granny & Bart the morning he left for Australia

As she is walking towards the door, she asks "Did I leave my keys in the car?"  (I know where I get that, too!)

Now, you can see why I love her so much...you can't find them much goofier than Granny!

Darren & Granny...isn't she lovely??

I am so thankful that I have got to spend 37 years with her!  She has loved me unconditionally, supported me, laughed at me, been completely honest with me,  shared with me, encouraged me, and taught me!  I love her dearly!  I am so blessed to call her my "Granny"!!!!

Thanks Granny...I think your first blog was a success!  Love you!

***If you would like to wish her a happy birthday or share a funny about Lois, please comment below!  Posts are sent to me first and then I post them...so go ahead and share!****

Happiness is Celebrating the Little Things!

Me & Mike...on the 4th of July

Growing up, my next door neighbor was a boy in my class named Mike Storm.  I feel blessed to say that Mike and I have been close friends since we were in 3rd grade.   Mike has been one of the best friends a girl could ask for!  He is loving, understanding, forgiving, funny, wise, and he truly appreciates the small things in life!  He has taught me so much and made me look at life differently!  You see, Mike has Down's Syndrome. 

Mike announcing at the Little League All-Star Game!  He is meant to be a STAR!



 Some people may read that statement and immediately feel sorry for him or his family.  But before you head too far down that path, I want to share with you why I do not feel sorry for Mike...actually, I am envious of Mike!  Let me tell you just a little about him!

Mike wrestling Darren on Easter!

Here he has Gary down for the count!

Mike LOVES God!
Mike LOVES life! 
Mike LOVES people! 
Mike LOVES movies, food (just like me, a little too much!), jokes, laughing, hugging, Coke, music, friends, sports, family, work...you name it, he loves it!
Mike is a steel trap for all kinds of information!  He can quote movies and knows the actors of any movie you mention...he knows the title and artist of every song that is played! 
He LOVES to talk about the past and tell funny stories...and maybe just maybe embellish a little!  He loves to see old friends and make new friends!  Mike does not know a stranger!
I never hear Mike complain or feel sorry for himself about what he doesn't have or about what he doesn't get to do! 
Mike has a passion for life and love for others that inspires me to be a better person!
Is Mike perfect?  No, he isn't, no one is!  Yes, he has his moments, like we all do!  But what I love about Mike is his spirit...his hope...his love...his humor...and his constant excitement for living life!

Mike with Brett, Bart, Belle, and Abbie

Mike has been a large part of my children's lives.  He celebrates birthdays, many holidays and other events with us!  He loves to go to their sporting events and I promise you, he cheers louder than anyone else in the stands!  Mike has helped to shape my children into loving and accepting individuals by just being a part of their lives! That makes me think of a story... I'll never forget the time I took him to one of Bart's Jr. High baseball games last year and as we were walking up to the diamond, Bart saw us, jogged out of the dugout over to Mike and gave him a huge hug!  Talk about making a mother proud!  How could I ask for more?



Mike with Bart, Turner, Rece, Darren & Brett


Without even knowing it, Mike inspires me and my family to be BETTER...to be more LOVING, more ACCEPTING and more THANKFUL and to see the GOOD in others! 



Mike with kids ready for the Super Bowl!

Yesterday, we went to watch Mike participate in the Special Olympics Basketball Skills event at the high school!  Each and every athlete was such an inspiration!  And what I loved most was the huge celebration of each small victory and the team spirit that I saw!  They were all cheering on their competitors...they were not mad when they didn't win or when someone did better than them...they enjoyed the competition and were thankful for opportunity to be involved!  They were happy to see their friends succeed!  Oh how I would love to see that kind of team spirit in our school athletic events!!!  Wouldn't that be amazing? 

Mike gave me permission to share these videos of him!  I promise they will make you smile and they will warm your heart!  I took them with my iPod so the quality won't be great...


So, as I wrap up this blog, I want to thank Mike for being a part of my life, for enriching my life and the lives of my husband & children far more than he will ever realize!  I thank God for blessing us with an angel right here on earth! And I want to encourage you to look around, count your blessings big and small!  CELEBRATE the little things in life!  Don't be afraid to cheer for yourself, just make sure you are cheering just as loudly for others!  Talk to your children about being accepting of others and their differences...expose them and yourself to people who are not like you!  Do something for others less fortunate and forget about yourself for a while!  I promise you will feel blessed beyond measure and your life will be greatly enriched!!   CELEBRATE LIFE!!!  Just like Mike does in the video below!



Mike LOVES to tell stories of the "good ol' days"...here he is with some buds!

 He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has.  ~Epictetus

just to make you think...

I don't have much time today...I must give in and clean up this house and do some major laundry!  So, I decided I would just share some quotes with you that will hopefully make you think...

Interesting question, huh???

                              Not always easy...is it?

                                 SO TRUE!!!

                              That's for sure!!!!

I always find it funny when people do things and get mad at the people who say what they did!  I'll never understand it!  I always say "If you don't want someone saying you were wearing a pink shirt, then don't wear pink shirts!"  Pretty simple really! 

OK, now for a funny one or two....

That's what I need to tell my family...Sarcasm, just one of the many bonuses of living with me!

Hope you have a great weekend!  I'm planning for a "serious" blog sometime soon!  Does that worry you?  I bet it worries my husband!  :)